Bella Vida Therapy

Molly Papp, MS, MPH, CSAT, LMFT #88196

Bella Vida Therapy

Molly Papp, LMFT

You deserve a beautiful life

Sex, intimacy, and relationship therapy

My First Engagement Post

My first engagement post; something I found from 2011. Today we are almost 10 years together:

Found my lobster....
So I got some unexpected but wonderful news this past week....I'm officially engaged! As great as that is, I actually sort of never thought I would ever get married. Not that I don't want to, I do. But I never thought I'd be so lucky as to find that one person who I love and enjoy being with more than anyone else and have them choose ME to be with forever. It's incredibly flattering when the guy you think is attractive, funny, smart, kind and loyal chooses you, you don't just choose them. Don't get me wrong- my relationship hasn't always been rainbows and puppies. It's taken 5 years of laughter, tears, fights, and regrets to get here. We have both made some pretty bad mistakes. But, we realized that we're in this for the long haul, and in the end, there is no one out there who makes me as happy as he does. We overcame our regrets. If I could offer up any humble advice to the single people out there, it's this: find a partner who you find incredibly special, and who finds you incredibly special. That's it. It's like the age old question of "how do I lose weight?" Uh, eat less and workout more. Simple. Love is the same. Yes, relationships are very hard and take negotiation, lots of communication (about likes, dislikes, sex, fun, morals, chores, etc), and a forgiving attitude, but in the end you need that one basic ingredient. It's like making cookies without the butter. It just won't stay together. You got to want to be with that person and find them desirable- big time. If a girl is wishy washy about you and always is "busy?" Not gonna last. Does he text you occasionally saying "Let's hang out soon?" He's not ready. Or you're not his lobster. (lobsters mate for life) Everyone deserves someone who will look at them like they're the best thing since sliced bread or color TV. (or PlayStation and hot sauce in my case) In return, you treat that person with kindness and respect, love and loyalty. That's all life is really about. I feel like I don't deserve the man I'm going to marry he is that lovely. I am so lucky. And that's a wonderful feeling.